Bare with me a moment…

    I need to get things off my chest:
    I have been thinking a lot.  My mind is a tornado of randomness that will not shut up.  It’s a little overwhelming actually.  If you were to look in my head space right now, you would see a swirl of colors and words in an out of control mess.  It’s a mixture of early onset empty nester syndrome (I tear up at the thought of anything Allyson related – but good tears), the events in Boston that are weighing on me (I really have to stop looking at the news), the plans that I have for my gardens and how I really want to be off so that I can get it done already, goals that I am setting for myself…..  I wish thinking burned major calories!
    I went for my run yesterday.  It was not the greatest.  I had taken the winter off and this was only my second time out ( first time was last week ) so I was not expecting a gold medal or anything.  The last run was great!  I had a good rhythm going, great music on my ipod, no one got in my way… AND my time was just a few seconds off from where I left it back in November.  Yesterday though, total opposite: Too many unsupervised kids in my way, BIG geese blocking the trail, music sucked, side cramps, people everywhere, wind in my face, my mind not shutting up and the fact that I felt like I could not lift my legs… needless to say, I was very distracted and became frustrated quickly.  My goal was 3 miles 12min or less pace (the furthest and best I run at the moment).  I wanted to turn back for the car after 1 mile.  I pushed myself to complete 2 miles before heading back.  In all, I did 2.5 miles.  I was ok with that but still a little disappointed.  I walked a lot more then I wanted to. Those 32 minutes felt like an hour. I keep reminding myself that I am still building my time.  It does not happen over night.  Although I do not train for races and no matter how slow I am at the moment, I am a runner and this should be fun! I enjoy the free feeling I get when I run.  I like when it relaxes me and helps to clear my mind. I am a person that is very hard on herself.  I’m a Leo. It’s what we do. Anyway, I plan on going out again tomorrow evening and again on Saturday morning. Repeat weekly…. I think next time I will change the scenery.  Maybe do a road run instead of the park…. change is good, right?!
    In other news: My baby is graduating! The big day is two months from tomorrow. Dan and I keep asking ourselves the same question over and over… What will we do once Al is away at school? Sure it’s pretty darn cool that we will be empty nesters before we are 40.  However, we are not rolling in cash where we can retire or travel when ever we feel like.  We seriously need more hobbies! We like to hike and talk long walks around town but that is not something that we do at night or when it’s crappy out… yeah we have yard work and other house projects – big woop! I know I will need something else so keep my mind distracted while we get used to the void. It will feel strange at first having her be away and we will miss her a hell of a lot… Ok eyes are watering again…. deep breaths…. BUT….
This is a question of other empty nesters – WHAT DO YOU DO when you only child or fifth child leaves home?  Join a bowling or darts team? I suck at both and am WAY to competitive! LOL

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5 thoughts on “Bare with me a moment…

  1. Well, you know me and my road to running again, SLOW! Had to do walk runs: walk 5 min run 1 min and repeat for 30 min. then if things went well next time walk 4 min run 2 min etc… until you run for minutes on end with only a few walk breaks. You will get there, just keep at it! And I know its hard, but I don't run with a watch, so I can't see how fast/slow I'm going. I turn MapMyRun on, shove phone in fuel belt and go. Then after the run I see my pace. Sometimes I run slower and it was a hard run sometimes I had a really good run and had a faster pace. Every run is different 🙂

    P.S. I don't have kids yet, but I'm looking forward to empty nest/retirement because there are SO many things I want to do! I LOVE learning, so I'd be inclined to take adult education classes at local CC (usually pretty cheap, some $60 for 10-12 weeks) and take art (painting, life drawing, jewelry etc.. but i also have lots of those supplies already), anthropology, cooking, baking or art history. I'd also take more/new exercise classes like yoga, cycling, barre, strength training etc…. there are SO many things I love doing!!!

    Since you love gardening, sometimes local public gardens allow volunteers to help maintain the grounds. My grandpa volunteered at a local Botanical Gardens for many years, got his own little space and maintains it even at the ripe old age of 85! Plus he gets benefits like going to concerts in the park for free etc… who knows what kinds of cool volunteer things that might interest you exist nearby!

  2. Like I said last night – perfect timing! These are some really great suggestions too with what to do when Al leaves for school. We do have a local gardening club. I should reach out to them :0)

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